After an annoying morning at uni trying to get an assignment handed in on time, its back to the crematorium to pay my respects once more. This time to my grandad who left this reality twenty years ago. The chapel is quiet this time giving me time to get my head around current events.

Ever been shopping with your sister? After deciding that it was time to get a new wardrobe, I decided to take up my sisters offer to point out whats "fashionable" to wear these days. I guess I'm a practical person. Jeans and a T-Shirt always seemed to go with anything. However, it appears that sis thought I was made of money as she pointed out all the designer clothes. Fashion is something that is hard to figure out where I'm concerned. If you stop for a moment and check out people in the street, you'll notice that they wear whatever they feel like wearing. So who's to say whats fashionable or not? I have the last say though so I only bought what I liked out of the choices she made. I ended up spending a lot more on clothing items than I normally would, but hey, adding a few name brands to your wardrobe can't hurt.

Its been twenty days since I last entered anything into this virtual diary. The main reason for compiling it is so I can keep an accurate account of my final year at university. I haven't been idle though. My final year project is a satellite-tracking program for Windows 95. I've been teaching myself C++ like theres no tomorrow. My first prototype was only half working. With no documentation and only the Microsoft Visual C++ help files to aid me, I had to figure out how to enable drawing in an MFC programs child windows. Finally sussed it when I worked out what a device context is and that I had to reference a base class called CDC.

I decided to check in on my email. As I suspected, my accounts were overloaded. I get annoyed by the amount of junk I get these days that I never ask for, and I don't mean spam. About a year ago some of the ex-Amiga sceners that I knew got together via email and started chatting about life, women and computers, etc. At the start it was great. I would check in on my email often to see what the latest topic of conversation was so I could add my 2p's worth. These days though its as if we've exhausted every topic and the cc: list seems to be trapped in a never-ending loop discussing what's on TV, what I added to my computer lately and "Did you see.." on TV the other day.

So I've gotten into the habit of scanning my email every few days and reading the first posting of each thread and killing the rest of the thread if the original posting is of no interest. This was fine at first but threads have a habit of changing topics without changing Subject titles. Isn't there a rule of etiquette somewhere that states that if you change an email/usenet thread subject matter, you must change the Subject line as well?

At every point in your life there is always a "most played record". You could be at work, in the car or at a club when you first hear it. After a while you realise that everytime you turn on the car radio its on. These days it seems to be "When you're gone" by Brian Adams and Mel C. I don't mind it to be honest. The video is not bad. Mel C actually looks cute when she smiles. The 'cute gothic girl next door' look seems to be working for her at present. She appears to of gone tattoo mad lately, adding a prodigy-style "angel" across her abdomen. I was tempted to get a tattoo once but the "permanent" part scared me off. I wonder how good lazer removal is these days?

Back to uni today. First though I drive to a breakers yard in Stockton to get some bits for my car. For some reason I've developed a limp in my right foot. I just can't walk on it without feeling pain shooting through my toes. Recently I had been unable to walk on my right leg for a few minutes due to a shooting pain at the top of the leg. my mam said its probably a trapped nerve. I'm not supposed to be out today because I have the flu but I've taken my medication and timed it so I'll be back in time for the next lot. I only came to get some books from the library and to check my email but I decide to go to the days last lecture. Afterwards though I become embarrassed when I calapse outside of the lecture room. A shooting pain at the base of my spine caused both of my legs to buckle and I can't get back up. My mam now diagnoses sciatica. I should go see a doctor but like most people, I think the pain will go away.

New Year is almost upon us and I have no plans so when the offer to tag along with the folks down south arises, I decide to go. I've long since gotten bored with motorway journeys so I just phase out, stare at the road and read the Model66 cyberpunk story on my laptop, downloaded from the net. Still got about 350k to go. I'm reading it in DOS because the glare from Win95 attracts to much attention from neighbouring cars, and besides, it adds another 20-30 minutes of battery life.

My relative just bought a new house and its pretty big. His two sons received a pool table for xmas. Not a full-size one but big enough to keep us all potting balls throughout our stay. I drew the short straw and I have to kip in the caravan outside. The gale force winds and constant rain will produce a full-blown episode of the flu by the new year. I do find the sound of rain on the roof calming, but it stopped and started so many times that the in-between periods were like chinese water torture as I tried to drown out the dripping sounds with a pillow.

We went shopping in Cheltenham and I was lucky enough to find the coat I've always wanted. A long black trenchcoat that touches the back of my shoes. It weighs a tonne but it was worth every penny! I wore it on New Years eve to a local pub in Malvern called the Green Dragon. They serve a half-decent pint of Guinness there. I recall standing at a urinal after the new year had arrived, thinking about a resolution. I'm not going to make one this year. Instead, I'll just play it by ear.

Its the early hours and the family have gone to sleep. Everyone is staying over so I have to give my room up and I get a put-you-up fold-out bed downstairs. My niece and nephew promise to wake me up in the morning to see what Santa has brought us. Not feeling the slightest bit tired, I slip on some headphones and flick through the cable channels. The Sci-Fi channel is showing Wraith so I decide to watch that. I remember watching this film years ago and then hunting around all the local video stores for a copy. Twelve years later and I still think that Turbo Interceptor is a cool car!

I sneak upstairs at about 3am to slip a pressie into my sisters room as requested by my mam. I think I'd make a crap cat burglar because I hit every creaky floorboard on the way up and across the landing. I've also discovered over the years that the trick with squeaky doors is to push them open fast so they don't make a long drawn-out noise. This does not work though if something is behind said door and makes more racket when struck. At this point my niece says "That you nanna?" I make my exit vowing to try again later.

As you get older, christmas just doesn't feel the same anymore. I miss the days when I just had to get up at 4am to see what Action Man accessories Santa had brought me. Luckily for me, my sister has some cool kids and I reveled in their enjoyment of the occasion. You can keep your Furbys and Teletubbies this year, Winnie The Pooh and Tigger were the favourites with Barbie and toy cars as the runner ups.

What did I get? Some new clothes, CD stacking system, scented candles, nodding Gromit.. and a 1999 Dannii Minogue calendar. Call me sad but I think she's cute.

Its the 16th anniversary of my Uncle Kenneths death and I'm accompanying my grandma to the crematorium in order to pay our respects. Its a cold day and my car takes a little longer to get started. I'm still using a screwdriver in the ignition even though I've installed a new steering column. The passenger door is too damaged for a simple repair so I've removed the lock mechanism so it will only open from inside.

We find his name in the book, place some flowers in a vase and sit for a moment in contemplation. There are christmas cards everywhere and the nearest one is from a child wishing her dearly departed parents a happy christmas in heaven. Doing the manly thing I get up and step outside for some fresh air.

A stroll in the gardens of remembrance does me some good even in the bitter cold. The crematorium is doing a lot of business today, both entrances are receiving grieving parties every 15 minutes. Jesus, do this many people die daily? I realise how precious life can be and how being depressed over stolen property is a waste of time. I settle on a mild maiming if I ever meet the car thieves.

Back at the car I'm happy to discover that my heater still works. I put Savage Garden into the tape deck and slowly ease out of the parking space.